Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Foster Care Trials and Tribulations

Foster Care? Yes, I am a little surprised too. It just sort of happened and now I know it is us. Along the way we have found out we are all a little more capable than we thought we were.

We loved a little seven year old with severe undiagnosed Reactive Attachment Disorder. We were her 9th placement and it resulted in a disrupted adoption. If you say you would never disrupt an adoption, you don't know until you are in the situation that requires this ending. I have read many books on RAD and done a lot of research since then, and I often have a case of the "woulda, shoulda, couldas," but I'll blog on this later.

If not for M coming into our lives we would not be foster parents - so there is a reason for everything. We decided to use our license for the rest of the year, knowing that there are many children who need a home. Our first placement was a temporary placement for 3-4 weeks. That baby has been with us for almost 10 months now. Another baby who was supposed to stay forever, left after only three months. You never know.

Our home has started to seem large lately, making me feel greedy for all this space. We are in the process of freeing up another bedroom so we are available for a couple more children. This is also a thin disguise for my teen girls to move into the very large family room - complete with a wall mounted TV and its own bathroom. ;-) Hey, they are doing it for the kids! (they really are, otherwise they could each have their own spacious bedroom instead of sharing one)

One minute I am excited and asking God to prepare our hearts for the children who are to come, and a moment later I am telling myself I can't go on and wondering if this is really my life.

I will be blogging about foster care, foster to adopt, reactive attachment disorder, birth parents, reunification, social workers, home studies, inspections, foster and adoption poetry, and why I needed to lock up my dryer sheets.

These are the trials and tribulations of a foster care family.


What do we live for, if not to make the world
a less difficult place for each other.
George Eliot


Jennifer said...

I really want to know about those dryer sheets. And I am so grateful to know you. You are a priceless wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend.. I love you..

Susan said...

Thank you dear Jennifer - you are the nicest person I know. I have now answered the dryer sheet mystery in my latest post. I love to complain, but I would lock up the toilet paper if it would help me to keep D and J! Love you more . . .